DETERRENTS TO TRAVEL ARE IN THE HEART
July 24, 2008 by admin
Pop Psychology Question #2 – “How will I fit into this social situation? No matter how suave and socially-practiced we are, our mind rehearses its own little worries just before entering a room filled with strangers. Often, it’s: “How do I look?” or “Am I dressed correctly?” and we will soon find out as we scope the crowd, sizing up the people in it. By adulthood, we’re pretty good at this business of relating to other humans who are, themselves, worrying about the very same things. But, in extreme cases, you might choose to stay home, rather than open that undefined door in a foreign travel situation. Ask yourself why you always like to have a buddy along, whenever you go anywhere: a spouse, a relative, a friend, a lover, anybody… who will buffer you from the appearance and the risks of being alone. Do you think you won’t have fun? Are you afraid of winding up alone among couples and cliques? Do you worry about being assigned a weird roommate? Are you unsure of yourself in other societies among people who speak a different language than your own? Do you simply hate to admit “that you don’t have a date” when you sit alone in a restaurant? Do you feel like people stare at you and talk behind your back? Why don’t you want to wing it and then, simply, see what happens?
Lack of launching out and doing it for the very first time, is why! If you did, you would discover the hidden satisfactions which abound in solo travel…..or, just solo arrival into a group situation. When you surround yourself with a known society brought from home, you have wrapped yourself tightly in a layer that cannot be removed, and that stands in the way of spontaneous friendship with others. You’ll never be free to spend real time getting to know a stranger, so you’ll never really meet people except in a superficial, surface way. You also must consult your buffer people before committing to any action. That is living life by committee and it can get very clunky. Sometimes, the votes aren’t equal. Plus, you never get any downtime to just vegetate, dream, write or think. Bah, on traveling pods!
Naturally, you’re stuck if you’re legally bound up by vows or birth to those who want to come with you and I have no advice to offer. Other than Patience, Patience, Patience!